Well, I’ve got 4 readers, and The Redhead has her own legion of fans, so, I suppose I’m going to hang around a bit, and best make use of that domain name.

So, if all 4 of you would, please, move on over to www.temerity-jane.com, I’d tooootally appreciate it.

And maybe if we just do it all quick and smooth-like, the Redhead won’t kill me for confusing her fans.

No, no, what drives me crazy in the game is exactly the same thing that drives me crazy in real life – other people.

Specifically, two attitudes held by “other people” that are just so illogical/infuriating to me that after weeks on end of silence, I will actually appear in /g to rip someone up one side and down the other when these hot buttons come up.

…. this post can now be foind with everything else, here.

TJ- YOU HAVE POSTED NOTHING ABOUT ME SINCE MY DEPARTURE. AM ENRAGED. YOU HAVE 24 HOURS TO RECTIFY THE SITUATION, OR THIS BLOG WILL EXPLODE. HUGS, THE REDHEAD

BRK: isn’t her comment the equivalent of posting about her?
TJ: she won’t see it that way
TJ: Luckily, I have draft posts for just such an occasion
BRK: you’re gonna let the terrorist win?
TJ: She’s really scary.
BRK: pretty AND scary?
TJ: Yes. She’s both.

—————————————————————————–

So, here you go – The Redhead on how to be internet successful.

The Redhead: that’s the key to blogging
The Redhead: have at least one friend who’s an attention whore

So I mentioned in my earlier post that I’m having a hard time sleeping. Everyone does, once in a while, but last night, I actually ended up throwing a full blown tantrum. All by myself, no one around to see it, but imagine, for a second, what kind of frustration it would take to drive an adult to actually pitch a fit.

I’m going to step delicately around the source issue because, while few people read this site, even fewer have been apprised of the details of my current situation, so we’ll leave it a bit hazy – the problem resides in my right leg. At the best of times, it takes me a bit of time and maneuvering to get comfortable, and I shift positions rather frequently.

Last night, however, was not the best of times. Normally, I tend to regard this issue as an inconvenience and go about my life as best as I can. But last night… a step off the “inconveniece” scale right into the “I’m going to rip the goddamned thing OFF!” department.

Have you ever seen some really half-assed Christmas lights? You know, where someone seems to pitch a handful of them into a bush, next to some discarded Bud Light cans and an old tire, and they blink on and off with absolutely no discernable pattern whatsoever? That’s the best comparison I could come up with for how I felt last night – completely random flashes of pain from my hip to my calf, just lighting up over and over and over while I laid there and ineffectively said “Stop, stop, come on, stop!”

So anyway, right, it’s hard enough to fall asleep with that going on, which had me clenching my fists in frustration – I was SO tired I couldn’t see straight any more, and I just had to keep moving and moving and moving to find a position comfortable enough that I would be able to take advantage of a few peaceful moments and fall asleep.

But here’s the rub – no matter what side I lay on, no matter where I am, how tired I am, who I’m with, anything – no matter what, I always turn from whatever side I’m on to the other one right before I actually fall asleep. There’s no avoiding it. I can’t trick me. I will turn over.

So, that leaves me with this situation – I’ve got to fuss around long enough to find a position comfortable enough for me to relax and fall nearly asleep – knowing damn well that I’m going to turn right out of that position if I ever do manage to relax that much.

So do I lay on my right side, and struggle to find a cozy contortion while laying on the problem, since when I turn over, I’ll spend the night not laying on it? That takes forever.

Or do I lay on the left side, knowing it’s easier to get comfortable enough to fall asleep, but knowing that when I turn over, I’ll be turning onto my right side and probably jerk myself back awake only to start the repositioning battle all over again?

So, which do you think I chose (after that aforementioned tantrum, of course)?

Turns out, if you tantrum enough to completely and totally exhaust yourself, you’ll eventually pass out flat on your back around 3 or 4am.

1. World of Warcraft

Hee!

2. TED Talks
Specifically, Ze Frank’s nerdcore comedy, Jane Goodall, and Michael Shermer was extremely enjoyable. Plus there are about eleventy billion more that are just as awesome, with Mena Trott, Steven Levitt, etc. Go watch some TED Talks.

3. Not wearing shoes.

Things I Don’t Like

1. People who tailgate me on my way to work or honk at me when they’re behind me while I’m trying to make a turn. You must understand, people – there is nothing you can do to make me go faster or turn sooner, I will go when I am damn good and ready.

2. Having a ridiculous amount of trouble sleeping and having to go to work anyway. I miss college. All my best sleeping was done when I was supposed to be in class.

3. Stepping on slugs with my bare feet.

I’m pretty sure this means I’m Wolverine.

I think we were at Old Navy 3 times.

Anyway, eventually we got hungry and went to Fuddrucker’s and as we were leaving, we were each eating a cookie and walking back to my car.

Pie: I was going to throw away this cookie wrapper because I don’t want it in my car, but then I realized, we have your car, and there are no rules in your car.

TJ: *snort*

Pie: It’s like a little Vegas you can take with you.

(Edited to add: I just now remembered I left my cookie in the glove compartment. Crap.)

In honor of this occasion, I’m allowing her to explain herself to y’all, so that you don’t hold her absence against me.

———————————————————————————————————

I guess you could call it a quarterlife crisis. I call it drawing the fucking line.

In a few hours, dear Temerity Jane readers, I’m going to walk out of my office, hop in Pablo, my ’97 Nissan, and drive until I get to sunny California, where, with any luck, I will be able to find an apartment and a job.

Why? Because I’m tired of being treated like crap at work. Because I’m tired of paying almost a grand a month for an apartment in a city I don’t even like. Because the next time I see some douchebag at a bar wearing khakis, a blazer and a congressional ID, I swear to god I am going to commit a felony. But mostly because I’m young, I’m childless, and I don’t owe it to anyone—not my parents or my employers or even TJ—to keep living my life according to some bullshit script that doesn’t make me happy.

I am absolutely sick to death of hearing these middle class, college educated white kids gripe about their lives—overworked, underappreciated, underpaid. Boo fucking hoo. Attention cubicle monkeys: If you’re willing to come in to the office every day for $25K or $35K or whatever the amount, to do work you think is beneath you, then that’s exactly what you’re worth. Surely somebody at your overpriced private college explained capitalism to you?

So that’s all to say that at some point you have to take responsibility for how you allow yourself to be treated, which is why I’m taking a huge-ass flying leap. Maybe I’ll find some sweet PR job out West. Maybe I’ll just bartend and sleep late. Maybe I’ll learn to sew. But whatever happens, I know this: Success isn’t a great job, or a sweet apartment, or anything else that your high school guidance counselor probably imagined for you. Success is living a life that makes you happy, and no one is going to set that up for you. You have to go out and find it your damn self.

******

Worry not, TJ readers, I will be back on the internets in short order. Shorter if my goddamned iBook hadn’t died at the worst. possible. moment., but in the meantime TJ can keep you occupied with tales of my biting wit and brilliant wisdom. As Nixon said, peace the fuck out, yo.

Boss: Oh, you look nice today.

TJ : MY UNDERWEAR TOTALLY MATCH THE THEME. So… uh. I wanted to talk to you about an alternative work arrangement… hrrm.